Saturday, March 17, 2018

Tomb Raider (2018) - Unsurprisingly Horrible


Video games and movies have had a dysfunctional relationship since the days of Mario. With the rise of home entertainment drawing audiences away from the movie theaters, thanks in part to video games and streaming services, studios have been trying desperately to appeal to demographics they don't actually understand, by making adaptations of another visual media they also don't understand. To this day, the only excellent video game adaptation is Prince of Persia, and that's only because the director actually bothered to play the games and gain creative ideas for translating them to the silver screen. Every other video game adaptation has either misunderstood or brutally mutilated the source material entirely. Preferring to believe that by just slapping on the aesthetics of the game onto whatever generic and bland story they can muster, penned by whatever intern happened to be at the studio that day, it'll make enough money to cover the new Lambergini the producers have been saving up for. In other words, the curse of video game adaptations is still alive.

For those of you who may not be well versed in the world of video games, please allow me to give you a quick bit of history. I assure you, it is more interesting than the movie. Please note that I will not be discussing the previous films with Angelina Jolie mostly because, as silly as those movies were, they are still better, if only because they embraced their silliness.

Tomb Raider is one of the most popular game series dating back to the days of the first Sony PlayStation. It began as a 3D platforming adventure game inspired by Indiana Jones in the like, except the player took on the role of Lara Croft. A brave, capable, and intelligent woman who could give many other adventurers a run for their money. However, the real draw to Lara Croft's character, and by extension, the games she was starring in, can best be explained in this image.


You see, Lara Croft, in addition to being a cool and bad-ass character in many different ways, was also the first sex-symbol of gaming. Complete with an unrealistic body, revealing outfit, and a big pair of...pistols. While I don't really look back on this as an entirely negative presentation of the character, I do agree that it wasn't the best beginning for her either. Despite that, Lara Croft would go on to have many adventures, and with each and every game, Lara would evolve as a character. Not just physically, but also in relatability, both intellectual and emotional. Her ultimate turn around as a more interesting and three-dimensional character wouldn't come about until the 2013 reboot simply titled Tomb Raider. 

It was this iteration of the series that, arguably, made Lara Croft into a more textured and well-rounded character. Making her more human and relatable with determination and courage, thereby elevating Lara Croft into a more accesible version of the inspirational symbol of feminism she always had the potential to be. It is still a better iteration of Lara Croft and is still one of my favorite games to play. If you haven't played this game yet, I highly recommend you do so. Don't just take my word for it, check out this review from The Escapist

Now let's talk about the new movie. 

The story follows Lara Croft (Alicia Vikander) as a wealthy heiress who has been searching for her lost father for nearly seven years. Her search has prompted her to not accept her fortunre on the grounds that it would officially eclare her father dead. Something she is not ready to accept yet. One day, she discovers a puzzle box containing clues to her father's potential whereabouts and sets out to find him. Turns out her father was a kind of secret agent/archeologist searching for proof of the supernatural. His search leads him to the tomb of a legendary sorceress who had the power to bring death in her wake. When Lara arrives she finds that a mysterious and evil corporation is trying to break into the tomb and take the legendary power for themselves. Now it falls onto Lara Croft to determine the exact nature of the legend and stop it from being unleashed. 

The best aspect of this film is Alicia Vikander, as she not only looks the part but plays the role to the best of her ability. While she is one of the most gorgeous women on the planet, her good looks are not her only wonderful attribute. Vikander has admitted to always having been a fan of the Tomb Raider games and Lara Croft as a character and that passion shines through her performance. Vikander maintains her professionalism and even brings a great deal of fun to the movie. She trained incredibly hard for the role and committed her body and mind to playing the part right. This movie could not have asked for a better actress for this role. So, it's really a shame that no one else could have been bothered to put in an equal amount of effort for every other aspect of the film. 


Alicia Vikander is literally the only positive aspect of this film. Everything else about the movie reeks of laziness, generic storytelling, bland plot, and little to no enthusiasm for the source material. Despite putting so much effort into her performance, Alicia Vikander doesn't really have a character. Much like Benedict Cumberbatch in Star Trek: Into Darkness, she's really just a walking plot device who morphs into whatever the plot needs her to be. One minute she's a sturdy down-on-her-luck street youth who can fight and do all kinds of athletic tricks, the next she's an unprepared tourist in China who can't even handle herself in a knife fight, then she's a bad-ass combatant who can handle a bow and arrow like she became Robin Hood overnight. None of these sudden changes in character have any kind of fluid transition or justification. She just becomes these things because the plot demands it. Not to mention, the whole drama with her father is so cliche and overdone that it's just dull. Lara Croft is many things, so "dull" should not be a word used to describe her. 

The villains in this movie are so cartoonishly evil that I honestly thought they walked in from an episode of Care Bears. Using slave labor, seeking artifacts that could destroy the world for no real reason other than they can, and a leader who acts like a teenager trying to look cool and scary because he found his daddy's gun. Also, the twist at the end of the film as to who the real villains are is so horribly tacked on and only serves as a last minute attempt at sequel bate. 

The action is so standard and by the numbers that most of the time it feels like they just lazilly reenacted scenes from better adventure movies. There's one scene where they have to go through three trials before reaching the ultimate treasure, and it just felt like a darker and less interesting retred of the climax of The Last Crusaide. None of the action scenes are in any way viscerating or exciting because I didn't care about any of the people involved. 

While I applaud Alicia Vikander's efforts to portray Lara Croft with the amount of commitment that she did despite not being given anything even remotely resembling a compelling character, I just wish she had the oppertunity to do so in a better movie. Once again, we are left hanging in the wind for that one other good movie based on a video game. Until then, we will always have Prince of Persia

Is this movie worth seeing? 
No. 

Is it worth seeing in theaters? 
No.

Why? 
It's a bland, dull, poorly constructed, painfully generic action flick that happens to look like a famous video game. Just go play the games or watch the Angelina Jolie movies. At least they have personality. 

Ladies and gentlemen, I am TheNorm, thank you for reading. 

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