Eddington - A Movie with its Head Too Far up its Own @$$

 

Rent on Apple TV and Amazon

    In the first film of The Lord of the Rings trilogy, The Fellowship of the Ring, Bilbo Baggins describes his overwhelming feelings about his age and the weight of his experiences as, "Like butter spread over too much bread!" This quote has also become shorthand (rightfully so) for describing something, mostly movie plots, that has significantly less narrative content than it portends to have. A promising sign of when a film has no firm understanding of what it is or what it wants to say is when it fails to utilize another important narrative tool, Chekov's Gun: a narrative device that dictates if you introduce something specific in the beginning of the story, for example a shotgun hanging over the door, you must be ready to use that element in the end of the story. Otherwise, the story will be robbed of any semblance of coherence and direction, leaving the audience feeling robbed of their time. 

    Today's subject, Eddington, is a poor attempt at a modern Western and an even poorer attempt at a commentary on American culture, specifically on what it has devolved into post-COVID lockdown. While the performances and the gorgeous cinematography are admirable at best, they are in service to a script that lacks commitment to any kind of coherent theme, genre, or story in favor of what I can only assume to be an attempt at recreating the sense of chaos and civil unrest felt by all the world during the heartbreaking year that was 2020. And even then, it still fails with little to no redeeming factors. 

    What passes as a "main plot" revolves around a civil rivalry between the Mayor (Pedro Pascal) and the Sheriff (Joaquin Phoenix) of a small town in New Mexico during the first few weeks of the COVID-19 lockdown in 2020. The Sheriff is resistant to the new and sudden rules of the lockdown and is not ashamed to be open about it, even though he fails to be open about his insecurities. In a desperate move to take control (in every possible way), the Sheriff announces he's running for Mayor, launching a campaign of anti-masking mentality, proclaiming it harmful to the heart of the community. 

    What follows is a haphazard collection of greatest hits from the initial horrors of the lockdown, a series of plot twists and turns with no discernible direction, and an attempt to provide surface-level commentary on the downfall of American culture that ultimately comes across as whining. All of which feels as though suffering a severe case of "First-Draft-Syndrome," the likes of which is typically found in most of M. Night Shyamalan's filmography. 

    This film is so unfocused and distracted by its objectives that it completely fails to accomplish any of its apparent goals. Even when it all gets lost in the shuffle, one can still see the germs of ideas floating around the story (toxic masculinity, dangerous online cults, unresolved insecurities, etc.), begging for proper development and a better outlet. In that respect, I am reminded of Disney's Frozen: another film with great ideas for a story that the film itself has no clue what to do with! 

   Eddington is an insulting waste of your time. It throws too many things at the audience and expects you to pick up the pieces without proper provocation to do so. While I am generally in favor of stories that require greater audience engagement beyond mere admiration, this story lacks the nuance necessary to justify its demands. If you want to watch a compelling drama set during the initial COVID lockdown, consider watching the dramatic comedy Locked Down. At least that film has Anne Hathaway giving one of the best delivered monologues in modern cinema history. 

    Skip this one entirely! 

Ladies & gentlemen, I am TheNorm; thank you all for reading.